STAY OUT YOU BLOOD SUCKING LEECHES!!!
Welcome to the Tipton. Where you and the rest of your baseball team will be
treated with the up most respect and courtesy.
You Yankees stink!
You're going down!
Yeah,but first,could you autograph my mit?
And my ball?
Please get out from behind there.
No!No!Not over the...Oh...I'm so sorry about this.
How many times have I told you not to disturb the guests?
2,708
But,it never gets old.
Thanks.
My pleasure guys.
Sorry dude, but this hand will never touch the hand of a Red Sox rival.
Not even if it had tickets to tomorrow's game in it?
I LOVE YOU, YA STINKING YANKEE!!!
-Yeaah thanks. -Ohh Ok.
NO! No, no, no, no! Don't break the Yankee!
Wow!I would love to play catch with one of them.
They're even cuter than that hockey team dad bought me for Hanukkah.
Heh.You should have seen the ball players back in my day.Like Babe Ruth. What a hunk!
You knew Babe Ruth?
Sure. Who do you think first called him 'Babe' ?
You know, I am sick of cute guys, I mean, who cares about looks?
Ok.
What else is there?
How about intelligence? Sense of humor, sweetness, a lot of creativity.
Ok, if you're going to do that, stop when I stop.
If you really care about all that junk, I know this guy, Gavin, who would be perfect for you.
I'll set it up for tomorrow.
London, that is so sweet.
Well you guys have so much in common. He has bad skin too,tons of blackheads.
I do not have any black...Ohh!!
It's a special magnifying mirror to enable to detect potential pimples while still at a subatomic level.
So,Maddie how about I give you facelift and do your hair for your date tomorrow
we can have a little spa day in my suite.
Ooh, ooh, me too?! I love to ski, spend, and spa, anything that stats with 'S'.
Ok,we'll do it tomorrow,it'll be so nice to just for once spend a day pampering myself
instead of doing what the boys want to do.
Hey Mom.We got three tickets so you can take us to the game tomorrow.
Won't that be fun?
Not fun!
It would be an opportunity for you to bond with the boys.
Whoah...I shudder just thinking about it...Whoahhh....See?
Whoah..Oh flashback!
The more you connected with them the less of your stuff they'll break.
You really expect me to believe that?
No.
Mr. Moseby please, please, please, please , please.
I never get a day to myself and the boys love you.
They love me?
No.But,they would if you took them to a baseball game.
I can't believe that hotel guy won't take his own kids to the baseball game.
-They're not my kids. -That's.Just.Not.Right.
Mhm...
But I-I hate baseball.
Now,that's just un-American.
Do you believe this guy?I guess he hate apple pie too,uh fella? And puppies and your own Mama.
Sir,I love my Mama!!
I would love to take the kids to the game.What times kick-off?
Aw the boys will be so thrilled. Yes.
Nooo!!
Mr.Moseby??
At a baseball game?
Those two things just don't go together.
It's like...like Zack and homework.
Or Cody and a date.
Oh, come on guys. He's really looking forward to going with you and he loves you.
He loves us?
No.But,he might if he spend more time with you.
Please, I never get a day to myself and I changed your diapers.
Oh no,she's playing the diaper card again.
You know mom, if we knew you were always going to pull that diaper thing,
we would have just sat in it.
Speak for yourself.
Wow! These seats are awesome!
Aw, these seat is filthy.
Well, we told you to dress casual.
This is casual, I'm wearing loafers and my pocket-wear is linen, not silk.
And my jockey shorts are a cotton blend. Sit down.
Ok, today is the day. I'm finally going to catch my first ball.
Or it'll bounce off your head,well, everybody rushes to stop the bleeding
and I can pick it up like last time.
Should we be wearing protective headgear?
Mr. Moseby, when you were a kid, didn't you ever dream about
catching a ball at Fenway Park?
Noooo,back then the ballet was my life.
Gee,there's a suprice,ah?
I was just a kid in the chorus. But I aspired to someday been picked
to dance the challenging yet coveted role,of Nutcracker Prince.
So, did you get to do it?
Alas,no. One nasty tether ball accident shattered my big toe.
It's just so painful for me to talk about.
Try having to listen to it.
Hey! Hey! Check out the lead, Pedunski's taking.
He's gonna steal.
You know, I read the encyclopedia of baseball last night.
All of it?
Well, you have to be informed, don't want to appear the boob.
You late!
Carrying research proves that stealing a base while theatrical, is statistically inadvisable.
No,no I'll tell you what's inadvisable Shooting off your mouth when you don't know diddly.
Well I'm sure this diddly is a fine fellow.But stastics do not lie.
Sir, stealing that base would be a waste of your time.
There he goes!
(YOU'RE OUT!)
Told you.
London could you get that?
Sure. COME IN!!!
-Wow! -Aaaa something's eating Maddie's head.
It's my hair. It's humid outside which tends to make it a little frizzy.
A little? You're like the bride of Frankenstein.
Are we done making fun of my hair?
Not quite.
Your hair looks funny, your hair looks funny OK, now I'm done.
Don't worry, by the time we're done, you're blind date is gonna think you're gorgeous.
YOU STINK! GO BACK TO NEW YORK!
Isn't that the nice man who gave us these tickets?
Another reason to hate the Yankees.
Zack,how could you be so rude?!
Miss Manners. This is a baseball game it's not your ballet class.
Mock me if you will but I was the only boy amongst twenty pretty girls.
Momma didn't raise no fool.
Look, it's his first time, cut him some slack.
Oh,not to worry,I can razz with the best of them.
Hey, Yankee, person. Your shoelaces is untied.It's not really.I'm just saying that as a ploy.
Clever.
You swing like a girl! You're weak! You'll never make it as a Nutcracker.
That's telling him.
(AND NOW, PLEASE RISE FOR THE SEVENTH INNING STRETCH)
Ahhhh...!!!
Isn't this the life?
Too bad we can't do it everyday.
Well you can't,but i can.Yay!
OW! Why'd you do that?
It-uh-stimulates the circulation in your forehead.It prevents wrinkles.
Oh, ok.Ow, ow, ow, ow... Aren't you guys afraid of wrinkles?
Nahh.When the time comes I'm gonna grow old gracefully.
Ok, Maddie let's get started on your hair.
Come over here and let's work some magic.
And for my first trick I made the comb disappear.
It's ok,it'll be fine.Once we wash, condition,blow dry,staight iron and...
...possible shave your head.
What?
I'm kidding.
Yeah,as long as I stay inside.
Otherwise it's attack of the killer hair.
Then it was pretty smart of me to arrange your date here at the hotel.
Look,i don't know why some people think I'm stupid.Ow ow ow ow....
It's a mystery alright.
(STRIKE)
Strike?! You're blind.
You tell him, fancy pants.
Thanks Arty.Hey some popcorn?
Yeah,don't mind if I do.
Mr. Moseby, your hat's empty.
Oh re-fill it boys.
Hey,how about some peanuts?
Yeah!
Oh,hey waiter! Three orders of your finest peanuts please.
And some cotton candy?
Sure and some...Ohh!
Never mind.
Haa?....Hey!...Ohh.
Good think I didn't order the canned ham.
I gotta say Mr. Moseby. For a stick in the mud, you're ok.
And for a pain in the derriere, so are you.
This stinks. It's the bottom of the ninth,the Sox are losing, and now I'll never catch a ball.
Not over yet. If he hits this, we still have a chance of winning.
-It's coming to us (No,don't catch that!)
NOOO!!!
I caught it!I caught it! I caught it for you.
No,thanks.
But, I insist.
Keep it.
But you wanted one.
Not that one.
Why not?
(Interference. The batter is out, Yankees win.)
That's why!!
To think I shared popcorn with the likes of you.
Nice going Mr. Moseby.
You lost us the game.
You are going to be the most hated man in Boston.
Oh,Pish-posh. I think you're blowing this all out of proportion.
Look!
Does my hair look ok?
Amazing, I mean, no one would known it's actually a giant tumble weed?
London.
Gavin,this is Maddie. Maddie,this is Gavin.
Hi.
You know, for two smart people, you guys don't say very much.
That's because we're so smart, we can communicate telepathically.
Oh yeah? What's she saying?And don't talk.
Well Maddie just said, she thinks we're going to have a great time.
And Gavin just said he wishes you'd leave.
Well, that's the rudest thing I've never heard.
Sir,your talbe is ready.
Oh,well,if it isn't little miss I'm sorry but this hotel doesn't stock your favorite flavor of gum.
Patrick,no one likes coconut gum.
I do,so apparently I'm a no one. This way.
Wait.No no no he have to had a table inside...Please?!Say Patrick.
So I see, now I'm a someone.
No it's just it's really humid out there.
Ah yes that would explane the lack of available talbes in here.
We'll wait,how soon can you seat us inside?
Breakfast.Splendid decision. Right this way.
Balmy isn't it?Enough small talk. Here's your table , here are your menus.
Would you like some crayons?
Well, this isn't so bad. Would you excuse me for a second?
Hello?
Carey!This's a disaster!
What's the matter?Is your date a dud?
Tell him your husband just got out the jail,works for me everytime.
No, he's great. But, we're outside, it's 95 percent humitidy, and I can hear my hair frizzing.
Thank goodness. Sanctuary.
-Traitor. -How dare you saw your face in here?
But, I'm the manager!
Well,Mr.manager, I bet your Mama don't love you now.
She did leave a nasty message on my cell phone.
Uhh, if anyone asks, we don't know you.
We just met you at the game.
And we didn't hit it of.
What? But, we were having fun we were bonding.
I'm sorry.Mom says not to talk to strangers.
Oh, hi! How was the game?
Oh, fine if you like being pelted by peanuts.
Great,glad you had fun.
I run as fast as I could.
No fast enough is growing.
No,it's ok.I got here in time.
In time for what?
In time to recommend the steak, it's fantastic.
Cool.Can we have some water please?
I'm not a waitress.
Then who are you?
-She's the shef. -I'm a singer.
I'm a singing shef.
Enjoy your meal try the steak not the veal!
I know.
Ha...Really is humid tonight,isn't it?
Is that?I hadn't noticed.
-Could you excuse me? -Could you excuse me?
I'll be right back.
I am not staying in any hotel managed by some,Benadict Arnold.
Me neither.I'm checking out and I'm going to stay at the St.Mark.
Blame me if you must,but please do not punish this magnificent hotel.
I'd rather die.
-Works for us. -Works for us.
Poor Mr. Moseby.If I hadn't made such a big deal about never catching a ball,
he propably wouldn't be in this fix.
Yeah.
We gotta do something.
Yeah.Wanna go get some ice cream?
Sure.
Whoaaa...!!!
Sorry,sorry,sorry,sorry....Ahhh!!
The hair spray is wearing off.I think I built up an immunity to it.
Ehh it's little frizzy.
How little?
Somewhere between a troll doll and unsheared sheep.
Oh,Miss London.May I get you a talbe inside?
Hey,I thought you said there was anything available inside!
I'm sorry,did your father own this hotel? I didn't think so!
Thank you Patrick but I just came up to check on my friends date.
Although I don't know why should after you thought rude things to me.
Well,we apologise.Now please help me blot.
You got mop?
That's why I need your help.See I really like Maddie which make me a little
nervous so it makes me sweat even more but I don't want her to see me sweating
so I have to keep running in here to blot which makes me sweat more.
Iou iou iou iou iou.... You,take care of that.
-Oh -Thanks!
Hey would you mind put some deodorant on my back?
Come with me.
It's not working.
It's alive!
I recommend the creme brule.
I recommend you go away.
Look, you've both been hiding something. The truth is, how do I say this nicely,
Maddie is a frizzy haired freak and Gavin sweats like a donkey in a sauna.
So now you guys can just relax and enjoy your date.
I mean if you can forget how hideous you both look.
Oh,great.More smarty pants "silent talk".
Ok, what are you guys saying?
I said that I love curly hair.
And I said that a little perspiration never hurt anybody.
Oh,this is so romantic...in incredible icky kind of way.
Now what are you saying?
Gavin wants to thank you for setting up our date and then saving it.
Aww!
And Maddie wants you to leave.
Well, do you know what I'm thinking up here?
-Nothing! -Nothing!
Wow, you guys are good.
I just hope Mr. Moseby's ok.
Well, if you're so concerned, why don't you just ask him?
Mr. Moseby.
There he is!
Oh! oh, my! no, no, no, no, no punching! I can't take hitting. oh! uhh!
How does it feel to be the most hated man in Boston?
I didn't mean to cause the Sox their game.
You think you'll have to leave Boston?
Leave Boston?He should leave the country.
He doesn't deserve this. Hold my cone, I'm going in.
Leave him alone.
Who are you?
I'm the kid he took to the game.
I don't know either of them.
Why'd you pull such a bone head move?
He couldn't help doing something incredibly stupid,it was his first game.
Wait a grown man who's never been to a baseball game?
It's not his fault, his Mom made him wear tights and play ballet.
Actually, I quite enjoyed the dancing.
But you go ahead.
May not have been the smartest move but he caught that ball for me.
For a kid who always dreamed of catching one.
But was too lame to do it himself. Because he has lousy hand-eye coordination.
I have astigmatism.Look, don't you all remember what it was like to go to your
first baseball game?To walk through that dark tunnel and suddenly see the stadium open up
in front of you? Smelling the newly cut grass and the fresh roasted peanuts.
The fat fans and nacho burps.
The point is, this man didn't think he'd like baseball but once he got there, he loved it.
Something got swept away in the excitement and caught the ball.He did it for me.He may be the most
hated man in Boston, but to me, he's a hero.
Well you know the kid's got a point.
And isn't that what baseball is all about?
Not winning or losing, but the love of the game?
Not if you lost your paycheck betting on the Sox.
You got that right.And he knocked us out of first place.
Behind the Yankees.
-I hate the Yankees! -I hate Him!
GET HIM!
Run boys run.
Let me know if you catch him.
As I may have mention every five minutes for the last hour and a half
but who's counting, It's Closing Time.
Isn't just a gorgeous night?
Absolutely perfect.
Hey fine,If you want to stay,I have one favor to ask.
We've run out of steel wool in the kitchen, we'd love to scrub the pots out with your hair.